Written by: Melody Stone, mama of 3 boys living and enjoying the chaos, and lover of all things caffeinated...bring on the baked goods and joy of life.
How to Romanticize your life as a Mom... Everyday Life just got a whole lot sweeter Mama... get ready to soak it all up.
Start: You need to remind yourself to celebrate the small things, to find beauty in the supposed mundane, and start appreciating yourself and all that you do as a mother.
When I think of romance I think of love, intimacy, kindness, genuine longing, and sentimental/raw emotions. Currently my romantic life is lacking. With my husband being gone for the past 10 months, deployed halfway around the world, I’ve been forced into shifting my mindset. I have learned to open my eyes to other aspects of beauty. I started writing, as it is something I enjoy, you know I found a hobby to fill my lonely nights, but hey… what I really learned along this journey is how to be content and change how I react/see life. I have learned how to be content alone, although I have my three little babies to keep my occupied most of the days, I’ve grasped on the feelings and raw emotions of gratitude, peace and the simplicity/beauty of the everyday. These are things that I want to share with you and I hope that in doing so you can open your eyes a little wider, slow down and smell the flowers, enjoy your coffee a little more, and hey learn how to romanticize your life; life itself is romance if you let it be. Learn to love it with me.
Digging deep now… as grounded as one can be… and I feel the urge and desire to dig deeper. I want to share how you can be a happier person/human. How you can be a happier mom/mama/mother/mama bear. How you can be happier in your motherhood role/a happier parent.
Tip #1 - LOVE your life in ways that you didn’t think possible - put those feelings aside and enjoy the now
THE ORDINARY... THE MUNDANE... you need to enjoy the now. Be in the present moment and learn to love it.
Do you have days like these? …
The days start to drag and blur together… you feel like the diaper changes don’t matter… the dishes and household chores never end… you just want to yank your hair out or cry in the shower because you are so overwhelmed thinking you must wake up and do it all over again… the full circle days of the mundane? These feelings are totally normal and if they happened to me I’d like to think that other moms/people feel this way too. I wish we could talk about it more, so here I am.
These little things, that you feel are mundane, actually do matter.
You have to start by telling yourself that and not only changing your mindset about it but learning how to actually romanticize the small things. For example, today I bought a new cleaner, yes a cleaner… and no this isn’t a cleaning blog… but the point is that although I was on all fours cleaning up my baby/toddlers feast that the floor was now enjoying to its fullest, my outlook on this changed. The cleaner smelled lovely, it was a lavender scent, it matched my purple shirt, my baby was learning to feed himself, my toddler was actually eating, and they were giggling because they thought I was playing peek-a-boo. These moments matter, these are the everyday and raw moments in motherhood, so let’s romanticize them together.
These little things, something as simple as cleaning your floor, can totally be made to feel important, and you can be a happier human by simply changing both your perspective and how you react to each minute of everyday.
from cleaning floors to stopping to smell the flowers... embrace the beauty in the mundane by accepting that life is made of exactly that...
Tip #2 - Play music to brighten your moments.
Embrace these Mama Mantras and Uplift Yourself.
In the realm of societal norms and social media we are often made to feel inadequate. Whether we are working or not we are criticized.
We are liked (loved with that little heart double tap) or ignored. Occasionally shared, but rarely. We are scrolled past or simply disregarded as anything of importance unless we are showing the most dramatic version of ourselves. The version that we think the world wants to see. The glamourous things we acquire or life we live. The people we meet or the places/unique experiences that everyone wants to go see/live.
I often feel like unless we are the most drastic version of ourselves, unless we share this idealized projection, or we selectively share what we think the world (our audience/the public) wants to see, we have no purpose of sharing at all. Simply put, that our existence, the mundane/the everyday doesn’t matter.
But… what about the everyday? How can we embrace the ordinary? How can we give life more meaning and love the life we live? How do we find meaning? How do we find a purpose?
What about the okay, the average, the normal, the routine, the simplicity of life… how can we truly LOVE our lives if we are constantly comparing or feel inadequate to others?
It is time to LOVE YOURSELF. It Is time to start loving every little bit of your life.
It is time to start LOVING all of your journey.
It is time to start appreciating the little things.
It is time to start romanticizing the life you have, not the life you want, the life you are currently living.
It is time to accept the struggles, the challenges, the growth and learn to romanticize all of it.
Here are some uplifting songs to help you romanticize your day/life:
Ariana Grande - Just Like Magic
Britney Spears - Stronger
Beyonce - Run the World (Girls)
Diana Ros - I'm Coming Out
Emmy Meli - I am Woman
Katy Perry - Roar
Taylor Swift - Shake it Off
Rihanna - Work
Tip #3 - FIND YOUR JOY-
What do you think it means to romanticize your life? Get up, go out and find what brings you joy.
When I think of romanticizing my life, I think it is to:
Find love, find peace, and find joy within yourself... in every moment.
We need to appreciate what we have right in front of us.
Your life may be different now...
Your journey may be changing...
You may not recognize your new journey as a mother...
That is okay. You are growing because of it.
Now you aren't alone anymore...
That cute baby you are holding is looking up at you with a deep loving connection like no other, that crying toddler that is pushing you past your sanity levels during their temper tantrums but equally looks at you with the largest grin of life and melts your heart, the toilet bowls that you spent most of the morning cleaning only to feel like they need cleaning again but you know your kids will have a safe relatively clean space to potty train, the groceries that you have to haul from the car to your fridge while your baby is losing their mind and your ice cream is melting in the hot sun but hey they might nap because of this and you have ice cream to enjoy later yay, the ant invasion taking over your front hall with the ants freely running about marching in your face singing hooray hooray (yup I’m a mom… referencing the ants go marching song in this post… it’s just so catchy) but it's okay because they are cleaning up the crumbs, the spilt coffee all down your shirt that you are contemplating slurping off your shirt because your so exhausted from being up all night cluster feeding but hey you can never have to much caffeine as a mama, the utter exhaustion of being a mom and wanting to have an uninterrupted bathroom break for even a split second but hey you love the feeling of being so needed by little humans… it’s all pretty great… we just need to flip how we see it and how we react to it.
The mundane does matter. It's the little things in life that make up your life into the great life that it is and will become in motherhood.
How you show love and parent your child matters.
Potty training your toddler matters.
Teaching your kids to show gratitude, compassion, love, and kindness matters.
Having a clean home to live in, a safe place to call home, company to cuddle up and read a story with, it matters.
Let’s flip the switch... Stop yourself. Breathe. Now change your perspective.
You can’t always control everything in your life, but you do have control over how you view each situation in your life.
You need to start building yourself up.
Allowing the sunshine in and allowing yourself to see the beauty in the everyday life.
You need to start asking yourself what would make it better? What would brighten your day? What makes you happier? How can you thrive as a mother?
Tired in the morning… sit down, take a sniff, sip and savor that coffee.
Chores to be done… put on your favorite song, dance with your kids while doing them, treat yourself when you’ve completed the task, make it fun and figure out how/what you need to do to make it that way. Music is a big mood shifter for me… dishes watch out mama has her beats on.
Errands to be ran… yay we have an outing for the day!! Let’s go on an adventure/hit up a trail before or after.
Go to your local coffee shop or bakery... go somewhere that brings a smile to your face...
Treat yourself to the croissants and savor every bite...
Rainy day?
… put on those cute rain boots... go jump in the puddles & dance in the rain!
Tip #4 - Mix it up
- it's this simple... Simplicity is Beauty
A few physical ways to help you romanticize your life as a mama...
Go for a walk or try a new hobby or soul search for one. (Get a journal, write down what brings you joy and what you enjoy, then make a goal to start doing that today!)
Take pictures of your everyday moments; the beautiful sky and your steaming delicious coffee or tea.
Read a new book, journal or flip through your favorite magazine.
Wear something you feel confident in. Something you would want to bump into someone wearing and have them say WOW YOU LOOK AMAZING. Something that makes you smile and brings you joy just because you are wearing it.
Buy yourself some flowers... smell them, put them somewhere you will see them and embrace those moments.
You deserve to be happy and smile!
I bought myself this flower hanging basket for Mother's Day this year and I couldn't be happier to look out on my patio and see them everyday!
Tip #5 - Positivity Switch -
It's all a mental mindset shift:
This is the easiest tip for you mama. Flip your switch. Change your mindset. Positivity only. Smile and improve your posture. Breathe and meditate. Shower and wash those locks. Take a minute to think and tell yourself you are living the most romantic life ever to be lived. You are the star of your own show.
Mama… you are amazing… everything you do does matter and by flipping on the positivity switch your life just got a whole lot hotter. Romanticize those yoga pants… you look great in them!
You need to start romanticizing your life. Start believing in yourself. Believe that your morning coffee is the best coffee in the world. Believe that the most mundane thing are exciting and new. You have to, because that's when you start truly living your best life. That is when you wake up every morning and you are excited to jump out of bed and start your day with a smile on your face and a sparkle in your eye.
All of these tips should help you to thrive in motherhood and should guide you in ways to romanticize your amazing story of life.
Stay inspired Mama and SMILE because you just made your day and mindset that much better by reading this post.
Check out my other blog posts for more inspiration, encouragement and content to keep you thriving!
Thank you for reading:
Thrive Mama Thrive Blog
Stay inspired!
Sending smiles your way;
Love/from: Tommy, Theo & I
-Melody S